Trump Presidential Campaign is filing for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy

http://modernliberals.com/trump-campaign-files-chapter-11/

NEW YORK, NEW YORK — According to several news outlets, the Donald J. Trump presidential campaign is in deep financial trouble. Now anonymous sources with Team Trump are signaling that the alleged billionaire will be instructing his staff to prepare Chapter 11 bankruptcy filings for the campaign operation. While some on The Hill say this is a disastrous sign, Trump’s camp is attempting to spin the move as “a pivot to something Mr. Trump is tremendously well acquainted with.

“If there’s one thing Donald Trump knows,” one source told us, “it’s the financial failure of an operation with his name on it. Why should a presidential campaign be any different than the businesses he ran into the ground on multiple occasions?” The same source said that while it would be “really easy and understandable” to presume that Trump’s comfort levels with Chapter 11 bankruptcy mean he’s a “shitty, no good businessman,” he and his team believe it shows he “gets tons and tons of chances” after failing “over and over again,” which they said makes Trump “just like the rest of us.”

When one reporter asked another aide why Trump doesn’t just dip into his sizable personal fortune to cover any fundraising shortfalls, the Trump staffer laughed nervously.




“Because, um, well,” the staffer hemmed and hawed, “maybe he doesn’t have quite the yooge fortune he’s told people he’s had. Also, because Chapter 11 is his favorite chapter in every book he’s ever read from The Cat In The Shitty Hat That Looks Like Terrible Hair to Oh The Places You’ll Go With That Silver Spoon In Your Mouth.”