Christie asks people to be patient while he makes up a new story.

TRENTON (The Borowitz Report)—Responding to fresh charges that he knew about the controversial lane closures on the George Washington Bridge last fall, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie today asked for the public’s patience while he makes up a new story.
“Today you have heard some allegations that are shocking and explosive,” he told reporters at a hastily called press conference. “All I ask is that the people of the great state of New Jersey give me sufficient time to invent a new story that explains my way out of this.”

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2014/01/christie-asks-for-publics-patience-while-he-comes-up-with-new-story.html