Friday, or an hour ago, or six months ago, news broke that Director of the FBI, James Comey sent a message to a number of Republican Congressmen about the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails. What about Hillary Clinton’s emails? Well, nothing really new. There are three more of Them. It should be noted that They didn’t come from Hillary Clinton or from her server. We don’t really know why They are supposed to matter at all. But that doesn’t make a difference.
James Comey, a registered Republican for most of his adult life, has spent the last few months being berated by the faction that has consumed the political party with which he once identified. I don’t envy Mr. Comey for being someone for those who feel angry and cheated can project at least part of those feelings onto. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he didn’t understand how impactful the message he sent to those Republican Congressmen would be.
Yes, there’s some information about Hillary Clinton, and we’ll look into it to see if it’s important. I am one of you. I am doing my duty.
But of course, when the media hears the words “Clinton” and “email,” they manufacture it into a scandal. There is no new information, no implication of wrongdoing, nothing embarrassing or consequential at all. And yet the Twittersphere descended into the teeth-grinding, hand-wringing, self-digesting frenzy of a would-be October surprise.
Donald Trump is very good at being a bully. His supporters do their best to live up to his example.
I am tired.
Tired of the misinformation and the endless news cycles.
Tired of the shriek of “bias” if anyone attempts to point out that the Clinton campaign, with their emails leaked and emails turned over to the public and with years of tax returns provided, are playing with one hand tied behind their back against a candidate who hasn’t even released his tax returns.
Tired of the seemingly endless ways arrogant and entitled men like Anthony Weiner find to take down women around him.
Tired of the gloating, glowering Twitter accounts with Nazi references and Jewish conspiracy theory leanings, and the ones who go through the trouble to email me, telling me that when Trump wins, my family and I will be “taken care of.”
I check FiveThirtyEight three times a day, half-listening to my boyfriend because I need to see whether Hillary’s percent chance of winning has gone down in the last hour, refreshing the site on my phone under the table and feeling impotent when the number is stuck.
I am tired of smart, capable women being called bitches, or wondering which Clinton non-story the alt-right will latch onto today or which evidence of corruption, of greed, of lies, of harassment, of racism, of sexism on the part of the Trump campaign will be ignored.
I am beyond tired of men who see women as accessories to show off their own wealth or vitality, the type of men who see a hot woman as a challenge, the guys who say they want a smart girl until they feel defensive or threatened by a girl who might be smarter than them.
If I’m exhausted, I can’t imagine how Hillary Clinton feels.
She’s stayed poised over a lifetime of belittlement and worse from those who would always hate a woman in a pantsuit saying she just might know best. A graduate of Yale law school and former Secretary of State who’s had to listen to a blustering know-nothing use fear to rile up people looking for any excuse to hate her. Who has been humiliated again and again in the public spotlight only to return because she still believes she can help us.
November 8th is thankfully only 8 days away, and when Hillary Clinton becomes President (I cannot force myself to type the other possibility here) at least this daily, incremental anxiety will be over. We are all going to be very, very tired. And we are all going to need to keep working.