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My body is continuing its revolt against all things good and true, so my mental acuity is scattered at best. But here's something I've wanted to get out of my brain and onto pixels for a while. It's based on nothing at all except my personal opinion. It's not based on polls, nor anything the candidates have said, nor any detailed analysis of which blocs of voters each one will appeal to. It's just my gut feeling. So here it is: my ranking of the 2016 Republican presidential field:
Vanity candidates: 0 percent chance of winning
- Rand Paul
- Ben Carson
- Carly Fiorina
- Mike Huckabee
- Rick Santorum
- George Pataki
- Lindsey Graham
- John Kasich
Not quite 0 percent, could maybe catch on if something really lucky happens
- Bobby Jindal
- Ted Cruz
- Marco Rubio
- Chris Christie
- Rick Perry
Legitimate candidates with a real shot at the nomination
- Jeb Bush
- Scott Walker
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